Abuse... or something else?

Here is the full conversation, as recounted by Ms Fulani:

Lady SH: Where are you from?

Me: Sistah Space.

SH: No, where do you come from?

Me: We’re based in Hackney.

SH: No, what part of Africa are you from?

Me: I don’t know, they didn’t leave any records.

SH: Well, you must know where you’re from, I spent time in France. Where are you from?

Me: Here, the UK.

SH: No, but what nationality are you?

Me: I am born here and am British.

SH: No, but where do you really come from, where do your people come from?

Me: ‘My people’, lady, what is this?

SH: Oh I can see I am going to have a challenge getting you to say where you’re from. When did you first come here?

Me: Lady! I am a British national, my parents came here in the 50s when…

SH: Oh, I knew we’d get there in the end, you’re Caribbean!

Me: No lady, I am of African heritage, Caribbean descent and British nationality.

SH: Oh so you’re from…

I wanted to do this as a straight poll, but I couldn’t… :thinking:

Whilst I think there’s a degree of pomposity, reaching into inappropriate conversation etc… it feels a long way from the “Abuse” claims being used as cudgel to beat the Royal Household.

1 Like

Generally speaking I’m all for beating the Royal Household, off wiv’there eds n’all that. But I agree with you, this sounds like a crusty old posh bint trying to find out one’s heritage don’t you know and the wokes and the BBC have predictably pounced on the said bint and made a great maelstrom out of cock all, it’s what they do.


Also, I reckon Ms. Fulani knew exactly what LH was after, and it feels like she (Fulani) was baiting her.


Well, if that is really an accurate account of the conversation, I would personally have found the insistence of the questioning to be impolite and offensive. The questions were only asked because the young lady had a black face. If I, as a white person, had been in her shoes, I am quite sure that I wouldn’t have been pressed until I revealed that my ‘heritage’ was mixed Scottish, Irish and English, so the questioning can only be seen as racist.

Having said that, I don’t think that Lady Whatsername meant any great harm: her outlook just reflects her age and class. I agree with @Vulpes that Ms Fulani was probably being deliberately obtuse in order to make a point, but I don’t blame her for that. I would have responded the same way.


Nah, THIS is abuse, but she’s white and Tory, so nobody’s too bothered…


Over sensitive idiot milking it. I have no sympathy for these trumped up complaints. I regularly ask people I meet where they are from because I, like SH, have a genuine interest. Just waiting for the compensation claim…


I’ve been asked (more than once) where I am from because of my Northern Monkey accent… sometimes from genuine curiosity, sometimes as a precursor to mockery… I don’t feel this falls into the same bucket as “abuse”. For fecks sake… I suspect, as mentioned elsewhere, a faux par is used to throw a much bigger and more complex can of worms out of spite. Rather than taking an opportunity to break down social and cultural walls, the sensationalism just adds more bricks…


Asking a black person where they are from is not racist or abusive IMO


Of course it’s perfectly OK to ask someone where they’re from - just normal social chit chat. BUT she should have stopped once Ms Fulani told her she came from Hackney, not carried on and on about where she ‘really’ came from. That’s racist because she wouldn’t have asked a white person where their forebears came from.
(I wouldn’t have sacked her for it - a formal warning would have been sufficient - but the royals are obviously trying to tread carefully just now.)

1 Like

To follow up on my above views, if there has been any abuse, I would say that Ms Fulani has borderline abused SH through ageism.


The ‘Lady’ Mone case is certainly a particularly egregious example of serious corruption, and deserves a lot more attention than it’s been getting. I think you’re saying it’s a much bigger issue than the Fulani case, and I agree completely.


Meh… its been blew out of proportion big time.

1 Like

The Daily Mail knows its readers love stories about ‘the Palace’.


I try to avoid all news these days… everything has to be sensationalised. Its depressing and wokery is everywhere. I’m off to bury my head in the sand


I can’t help being fascinated by the news, Andy, but I don’t know why: it’s almost always bad.


Yeah, that’s because people like you and me just like being awkward and winding people up. You and I are that old geezer in the flat cap driving a moggy thou at 18 mph at the front of a queue of forty vehicles having the time of his life. :grin: :grin:

1 Like

Oh, it was you I was stuck behind the other day, was it?
(I’ll admit to being an old geezer though. When I bought my Triumph, the dealer gave me a list of reg numbers to choose from. I chose the one ending in GZR. :grinning:)


IMO it’s primarily a generational thing, plus a degree of arrogance / insensitivity from someone with a privileged upbringing (although not having a privileged background I can well imagine the MIL having a similar conversation). Lady SH was probably trying to make conversation (perhaps clumsily) possibly with a genuine interest, I don’t think any abuse was intended.
Lady SH could see Ms Fulani was coloured.
Ms Fulani could see Lady SH was elderly.
If there was abuse it was flying in both directions.


Correct me if I’m wrong, as I appreciate my facts are squarely from films and TV, but it is quite normal to ask a white American “where you from” and they’ll happily say “4th generation Irish” or some such other…

So, it seems the implications of “where are you from” sit simply between whether you choose to be offended or not.

No one “knows” if I ever mean to offend anyone and as such people being offended is entirely up to them. Just because someone choses to be offended, doesnt necessarily mean that I meant to offend them.

I’m offended by boybands FFS!