‘Offended’ is a funny word. I don’t remember ever having heard someone claim to be ‘offended’ by something. ‘Offended’ is mostly used as an insult: it’s what you are accused of being when you tell someone they’re out of order.
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Norn Iron thing too… I yous it quite often 
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People who like to sing along to songs but don’t really know the lyrics and are slightly off key. Aargh!!
…word is on the street
…fire in your heart is out
…sure you’ve heard it all before
…never really had a doubt
I don’t believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now
…roads we have to walk are winding
…all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I…
Like to say to you
But I don’t know how
etc.
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Drivers who tailgate, especially in long, long queues of traffic where them tailgating you can have absolutely no effect on your progress and thus theirs. I despise tailgaters anyway, but the main part of my commute to work is a very busy but very twisty rural A road with only one dedicated passing place on a hill towards work and two on the way back and limited other overtaking opportunities at peak times so getting mired in enormous queues behind a Honda Jazz which is driven at 35mph, slowing to 20mph for bends is not unusual and having someone tailgating and being a moron behind me is guaranteed to give me dark thoughts about what I would like to do to them 
.
HOWEVER I have also discovered what has become one of life’s small but very pleasurable activities related to this since having my bike. There’s a long stretch of 30mph road near to our house which I do 30mph on but which loads of drivers just ignore. I enjoy immensely on the bike making sure that I do EXACTLY 30mph if I am being tailgated in the 30 zone and then accelerating hard once the NSL sign is reached if the road is clear ahead, looking back and seeing the tailgater as a little speck in my mirrors 
. The drivers who tailgate in that 30mph zone, ironically, are usually the same ones that actually will not then exceed 45mph on any road, so even just driving normally in my car they drop behind, but leaving them behind so emphatically when on my bike has become something that makes me grin 
.
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The 40mph club…ggrrr they drive at 40 everywhere, national speed limit road and you’re stuck behind them, get to a 30 and slow down but they carry on doing 40 and pull gradually away from you, back into the national speed limit and you’re stuck behind them again…
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Yep PatW. These too.
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As @MrsVisor has said, always seems to be a honda at the front of most queues on the road. Bizarre.
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This is indeed one of the pleasure of biking. Hmmm…I think I feel another topic coming on.
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Food served on a slate, any juices just running off… you feckin’ arseholes!
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People who cannot be on time.
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I agree. I’m married to one.
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Giving me type 2 diabetes just reading the description
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My pet hate, its…mothers day, fathers day, international animal day, mental health day, lesbian cheese eaters day! Every day is something or other day, jesus christ give me a break day
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Where can I buy this lesbian cheese of which you speak? I think that last one is called ‘Easter’.
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Start at the top of the eighteen holer DM’s and work up’ards!
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I prefer my cheese extra mature rather than extra butch…actually that’s probably just getting me in to more trouble.
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People who “hope that I am well” on an email who don’t know me at all. Do you? Do you hope I am well? Why? Surely you just want whatever it is you have emailed about addressing. Unless you’re worried that I am about to depart this mortal coil before completing my work…
People I have emailed to do something for me who haven’t done it but think “lol” or a smiley face makes me feel somehow OK about the fact they’re lazy or don’t understand what it is I am asking. The not understanding is in itself obviously fine as we all need to ask for clarification sometimes…but just ask me, don’t ignore the question because you don’t get it and just use lol. For example “Please could I have some more information about those apples? Are they red, green or yellow? Do they have stickers on and what do they say? I have attached two photographs - one shows a red apple and one a green apple to help you if you are unsure. If you need any assistance, please don’t hesitate to give me a call, I am always happy to help”. Reply “No idea, I just know they’re apples, I’m no good at apples, lol :)”.
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Whoooping from an audience
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