Jealousy is not a good look 
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Did they keep you standing around for long?
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About 12 inches
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Oh, he’s got a massive…
Overdraft…?
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Only when he’s wearing that skimpy g-string.
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Is that what you golfers describe “a water hazard?” 
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The powers that be (The R&A) now call them penalty areas, f**k knows why as it’s nothing to do with poofball, which is a game of cheats 
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Well yesterday actually, but waited for my new boots to be delivered after an internet brain fart/press buy when pissed 
Anyhoo UPS did the necessary so I had a little spurt out to give them a try before dark and very nice they were too. I now have 3 different pairs of boots but only 1 pair of feet 
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We’ve all done it… 
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What are they? (Not boots…I understand that …what are the boots you bought?).
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Daytona Road Star GTXs. I blame them cookie things. A pop up ad came up from FCMoto while I was looking at something else. I know they’re in Germany but I’ve bought from them before pre B****t, so had no issues with buying from them. They were reduced, then reduced by another 10% off during September. Even with the dreaded import fees they were still loads cheaper than the UK sharks, so I’m made up TBH. Shows just how much we’re being ripped off over here when I can buy them from FCMoto, who are still making a profit, selling them for around £260.
I’ve got a pair of M Stars which were great on the GS’ but the RS has a more acute knee angle so needed something else. I bought a pair of AlpineStars Web Gore-Tex which are a Ride mag best buy which were just over £200, while the Road Stars were over £400 at the time in the UK. They’re really good boots, but I always regretted not buying another pair of Daytonas, so when these popped up impulse got the better of me
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I have a pair of Daytona Travel Star GTXs, very similar, bought second hand some years ago on eBay. They are great quality and very comfortable and protective once I get them on, but the sideways-curved zips which are a feature of most Daytona boots make them very difficult to put on for me. They jam at the curve, so I hardly ever wear them. 
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Do your boots also have the shorter, straight zip on the otherside of the boot? I undo both zips before I put my foot in, then do the curvey one up 1st, pushing the front flap across towards the curvey zip to help align the teeth up and take the pressure off the zip. After that I do the straight one up. Seems to work for me 
Yes, I do that too, but it’s still too much of a struggle to be worth the hassle. I have two pairs (one and a spare pair) of soft unlined leather summer boots (unknown make, but with ‘Euro’ on the sole), which are not very protective but are very comfortable indeed, which are my usual go-to boots.
For colder or wet weather, I have a pair of Hein Gericke ‘Tuareg’ boots, which are much stouter and also very comfortable.
I have also invented a pair of Velcro straps to go round trouser legs to make it easier to get my riding jeans inside my boots. (I wear my leather trousers outside my boots.)
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You must have Jockfoot, it’s a rare condition normally only effecting men who wear skirts above Carlisle
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Didn’t you know that we walk on water?
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Today I was mainly crushing 40kg of apples to make cider…
SG 1.048 = 7% strength
Then I got all Pie-triotic!
(Ok, it’s more of a savoury flan thing, but the joke doesn’t work then)
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Is the Carlisle higher than the knee?
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